How A Mental Health Vacation Helped Me Reset

Hey y’all! *deep sigh* I’m back writing and it feels so good! I took a break to prioritize my sanity and self-care. Truth be told, I’ve been juggling quite a bit. Working my 9-5 full time, in school full time, single motherhood, and building my coaching business. While it feels great to be back, I can’t promise I won’t take another break, because I absolutely will if it’s needed. But I’m here so let’s get into it!

I vividly remember quitting my then-job. I walked into work on a Friday, and announced it would be my last day. I had a handwritten card for my manager thanking him for all the ways he’d shown he truly cared about me being great, but that it was time for me to move on. Little did anyone know, I had no real plan. All I knew was that I was exhausted. Burnt out. And missing out on things that mattered: moments with my daughter. Plus, I knew I was meant to be doing more in life.

Pause … Have you ever felt like life has just gotten away from you? You look up one day and realize just how much you’re missing? That was super true for me. My dad had passed away that year, and I couldn’t even grieve properly with the amount of responsibility and stress that my life included at that time.

Fast forward to December of that year, and I realized just how much I was suffering. I was burnt out, stressed, overwhelmed, and grieving. Basically drowning in life’s circumstances. And while I thought I was sending out clear signs that I needed help, no one seemed to notice.

Alright, back to the story. I pulled my manager aside, and thanked him for investing in me, and asked that he not fight me on quitting. He made it clear he wanted to see me win, and had proven that he was willing to go to great lengths to keep me as an employee. Weeks prior, he’d gone so far as to use his own personal resources and connections to help me with a situation I was having. However, this time, I was at peace with letting that job go, and asked him to simply support me in my decision.

I did not work for three months. The fact that I had just quit my job didn’t even hit me until later that evening. After I’d put my daughter to bed, I cried. It was a cleansing type of cry from tears I’d clearly held in for months! I prayed, and said God, I don’t know what I’m doing wrong, but I refuse to do it anymore. Help me figure it out.

Those first two weeks were pure heaven. Tiny tot was on Christmas break so we spent so much time together. It was great to just enjoy my kid. Once she went back to school, though, I had nothing but time on my hands. And that is when the real work began.

1.) I increased my self-care. I made sure I was getting plenty of sleep. I danced it out when I felt down. I drank wine. I cried every day for a month. I read books. I cooked meals that made my taste buds happy. I got my financial affairs in order. I deep cleaned my house and made my space more zen-like. Whatever I had to do to increase my peace and take care of myself, I did.

2.) Reflective journaling became therapeutic. I wrote in my journal every day. Sometimes just to vent and clear my head. However, I began to ask myself hard questions. What did I truly want for myself? For my life? What were my non-negotiables, and why? How had I ended here? I had no idea what was next for me, but I knew I wasn’t willing to sacrifice my mental health or time with my daughter ever again.

3.) I re-assessed my circle. Spoiler alert: I pretty much cleaned house. Funny thing is, most of the people who didn’t make it cut themselves out. I was surprised by how many of my “friends” disappeared after my dad died. But I figured if they couldn’t be there for me during my struggle, they didn’t deserve my presence during good times.

4.) I enjoyed the fortress of solitude. I spent a lot of time alone. At first, it sucked because I felt so very much by myself. Once I started putting a purpose behind that alone time, that quickly turned into a safe space for me. I was getting to know me all over again, and figuring out what I wanted, why I wanted it, and how was I planning to get it.

5.) Strengthened my relationship with God. I started praying more and reading my bible. At this time, I hadn’t been to church in months? Years? Little did I know, I would find my church home not even six months later. Jeremiah 33:3 says “Call unto me, and I will answer thee and shew thou great and mighty things, which thou knowest not.” (KJV) That encouraged me to stay close to whom I believed could help show me what I didn’t know. In return, I gained confidence, figured out my purpose, and began the journey of loving who I was while still working towards who I knew I was becoming.

Taking a mental health vacation helped me create space for myself where I could hone in on my own voice, sit with my mess, and sift through to what was next for me. I thought I was simply prioritizing my mental health. Instead, I gave myself a reset; a way to change the trajectory of my life for the better. I went looking for peace, and also gained faith, a sense of purpose, and clarity.

Would you ever take a mental health vacation? What would a reset help you accomplish? Drop me a comment. And don’t forget to subscribe! Later, gators!